2005-05-17 5:55 p.m.
So close, no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
and nothing else matters
Never opened myself this way
Life is ours, we live it our way
All these words I don't just say
and nothing else matters
Trust I seek and I find in you
Every day for us something new
Open mind for a different view
and nothing else matters
never cared for what they do
never cared for what they know
but I know
So close, no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
and nothing else matters
never cared for what they do
never cared for what they know
but I know
Never opened myself this way
Life is ours, we live it our way
All these words I don't just say
Trust I seek and I find in you
Every day for us, something new
Open mind for a different view
and nothing else matters
never cared for what they say
never cared for games they play
never cared for what they do
never cared for what they know
and I know
So close, no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
No, nothing else matters
My mood is dedcribed in the songs I listen to. Mostly the lyrics, but sometimes also the melody catches my heart:
-Welcome to my life (simple plan) Because I don’t belong, it feels like. I don’t really like anyone, except for Luke. Luke is a whole other story, I am ruined innside because of him, but I’m feeling calmer now. What next I do not know, but these lyrics represent the dream of fitting in, and the feeling of ”You don’t know what it’s like, so just shut up” Exactly.
-Nothing else matters (Nirvana) This is a song wanting me to be myself “Forever trust in who you are”. I want to be certain, and this song gives me strength to continue.
-Everybody hurts (REM) Everbody hurts. They do. Sometimes. And this song is for me to sit and relax to. I cry on the insides, but my outsides, my eyes, won’t produce the tears needed. I never cry, almost, but when I do, I get out all this tension, it’s unbeleivably good.
-It’s been a while (Staind) This song is originally about drugs, isn’t it, the addiction. My addiction to myself, to love, etc, etc. My addiction to Luke and his personality. My anxiety. How weak I am. Still it makes me better.
-Jolene (The white stripes) Please don’t take Luke. Please don’t take him, fucking Jolene. Jolene represents Andrea, his ex. Fuck it, I know she has all her power to take him back, I think she’s already done it by now, I am so sorry about it, but I try to uphold calmness.
-Behind blue eyes (Limp Bizkit) Same as welcome to my life. NO ONE KNOWS WHAT IT’S LIKE!
-I don’t want to miss a thing (Aerosmith) Luke told me to download it. I got addicted. Not now longer, but for 24 hours all I thought about was this song. It represents my feelings of Luke, how they were only 24 hours ago. No longer.
We were talking and flirting. Today, for once I thought things finally were going the right way. They weren't. I ask him :"What's up" His answer: "Andrea and Reuben has gotten together" And his world has fallen together and I realise that all he wants is her.. He is still head over heels in love with her.
I think.
Fuck it.
I love him, it seems.
I love his bed
I love his eyes
I love his smile
I love his personality
before | after
Miss These?
maybe - 2005-08-15
Why are you running away - 2005-05-21
Songs - 2005-05-21
EXTRAS - 2005-05-21
My songs - 2005-05-17
